tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4986882181347414615.post368004450086231141..comments2023-10-29T07:11:49.766-04:00Comments on Just Fiddlefarting Around: ThereJeffhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10858791213787473858noreply@blogger.comBlogger21125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4986882181347414615.post-51312975681284077512012-10-01T15:50:04.628-04:002012-10-01T15:50:04.628-04:00Thanks rmp. I've been feeling some heartache t...Thanks rmp. I've been feeling some heartache the past few weeks, so writing this was cathartic.Jeffhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10858791213787473858noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4986882181347414615.post-89493952052445197652012-09-30T00:21:27.536-04:002012-09-30T00:21:27.536-04:00a powerful piece. the last stanza adds such depth...a powerful piece. the last stanza adds such depth and heartache.RMPhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04054771419356465116noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4986882181347414615.post-8583587235955457052012-09-27T14:24:34.871-04:002012-09-27T14:24:34.871-04:00I thank you--both for stopping by for a visit and ...I thank you--both for stopping by for a visit and for leaving such a kind word. Jeffhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10858791213787473858noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4986882181347414615.post-82766056366554292172012-09-26T23:19:39.053-04:002012-09-26T23:19:39.053-04:00A very chilling and disturbing ending.... a mood t...A very chilling and disturbing ending.... a mood that you have conveyed with skill.Cressida de Novahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00169216942864690995noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4986882181347414615.post-65532794632711539392012-09-26T21:45:04.886-04:002012-09-26T21:45:04.886-04:00Laurie, I'm glad you thought so--thanks.Laurie, I'm glad you thought so--thanks.Jeffhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10858791213787473858noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4986882181347414615.post-7996910044436742682012-09-26T21:44:16.556-04:002012-09-26T21:44:16.556-04:00Thank you, Robin. The truth gets very negotiable w...Thank you, Robin. The truth gets very negotiable when it can get us in trouble. Jeffhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10858791213787473858noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4986882181347414615.post-62629037346197383862012-09-26T18:24:29.211-04:002012-09-26T18:24:29.211-04:00How much truth can a child own up to? The chilling...How much truth can a child own up to? The chilling part was the reddening water and his failure to help which will torment him for the rest of his life. Having had such adventures that often bordered on the dangerous I really felt this one. Great writing.Old Egghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14727444489103758018noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4986882181347414615.post-24634521221481737052012-09-26T16:00:57.466-04:002012-09-26T16:00:57.466-04:00Thanks Nimue. I hoped the matter-of-fact telling w...Thanks Nimue. I hoped the matter-of-fact telling would be a nice contrast to the hook at the end. Jeffhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10858791213787473858noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4986882181347414615.post-34354657394535516612012-09-26T15:27:39.050-04:002012-09-26T15:27:39.050-04:00Damn ! that gave me chills ...Damn ! that gave me chills ...Pratibhahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03060001943746107173noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4986882181347414615.post-47550085800553065552012-09-26T15:02:24.203-04:002012-09-26T15:02:24.203-04:00Bren, thank you. This poem is a combination of a c...Bren, thank you. This poem is a combination of a current local news story, a personal memory of a shameful action from my childhood (no, I didn't kill anyone!), and my imagination. I'm glad you liked it.Jeffhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10858791213787473858noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4986882181347414615.post-35899712909321123802012-09-26T14:58:30.492-04:002012-09-26T14:58:30.492-04:00Jae, thanks much. I so wanted things to end well, ...Jae, thanks much. I so wanted things to end well, but knew I was done with it when I wrote the word "cried." Jeffhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10858791213787473858noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4986882181347414615.post-74274801954947492842012-09-26T14:54:17.876-04:002012-09-26T14:54:17.876-04:00Thank you for reading to the end, Sheilagh. Thank you for reading to the end, Sheilagh. Jeffhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10858791213787473858noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4986882181347414615.post-8534903789562178202012-09-26T14:53:19.648-04:002012-09-26T14:53:19.648-04:00No apology necessary, Leigh. I was trying to lead ...No apology necessary, Leigh. I was trying to lead the reader astray, so the fault is mine. It started pretty straightforward, but things took a dark turn . . .Jeffhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10858791213787473858noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4986882181347414615.post-71300593631388487972012-09-26T14:47:17.021-04:002012-09-26T14:47:17.021-04:00Christopher, Thank you, your comment means a lot!Christopher, Thank you, your comment means a lot!Jeffhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10858791213787473858noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4986882181347414615.post-41925315612147657702012-09-26T14:45:11.008-04:002012-09-26T14:45:11.008-04:00Thanks Chris. Thought I'd give a go at a narra...Thanks Chris. Thought I'd give a go at a narrative poem this week. Sometimes they work, sometimes they don't!Jeffhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10858791213787473858noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4986882181347414615.post-24871148698814199562012-09-26T14:32:28.980-04:002012-09-26T14:32:28.980-04:00Oh yikes.... very nicely woven. I thought he'd...Oh yikes.... very nicely woven. I thought he'd fallen into deep water and gotten swept away but... he did him in! <br />Wicked short story, had me really gripped and what an ending! <br />Really enjoyed it Nico and, thanks for your lovely comment.Daydreamerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04139175719967937843noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4986882181347414615.post-82896531892623083542012-09-26T13:34:16.415-04:002012-09-26T13:34:16.415-04:00Yes the tempo and tone were perfect..really had a ...Yes the tempo and tone were perfect..really had a sense of walking through the scene..a kind of crime scene perhaps all at once removed but painfully real..Jae Jae Rosehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11509244123008832611noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4986882181347414615.post-48519835445639137612012-09-26T12:07:48.529-04:002012-09-26T12:07:48.529-04:00ooh chillingooh chillingSheilagh Leehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13741333943021570641noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4986882181347414615.post-9818462213211449722012-09-26T09:55:51.115-04:002012-09-26T09:55:51.115-04:00This had me fooled Nico. I read slowly, scrolling...This had me fooled Nico. I read slowly, scrolling down line-by-line, thinking how the apparent story-line reminded me vaguely of 'The Big Brown Trout' by Robert Travers (A short story from 1967); and then I came to your last verse, and was chilled. I really thought the adults were interested in the whereabouts of a famous, old, elusive fish. This is a fine poem, and I apologise for assuming a light-weight intention that was not there.Altonianhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02841390371168941022noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4986882181347414615.post-74057793154163997092012-09-26T09:45:46.676-04:002012-09-26T09:45:46.676-04:00The movement is precise and the sequence well defi...The movement is precise and the sequence well defined. This is great work.christopherhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04201537517464996231noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4986882181347414615.post-31735239252960916162012-09-26T09:19:40.674-04:002012-09-26T09:19:40.674-04:00Nice story in the poem. Nice story in the poem. Cgullhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05278892052776188221noreply@blogger.com