Three Word Wednesday, prompt words nasty, heat, cease.
Awake
Before we make fools
of ourselves
by nasty words
and worse actions;
when light and heat mingle
with quiet breath
and we are not ashamed;
depending on something
other than
what we wear, own, or believe;
that brief moment
that touches eternity,
exposed
yet precious
like a child, like a child.
Each morning an entrance
where knowledge vanishes,
prophecies fail,
tongues cease.
such a true statement,I love the turn of phrase that you have.
ReplyDeleteWhat a truly telling poem that really was enhanced by the repeating "like a child". I also like the last three lines that echo the biblical chapter Corinthians 13.
ReplyDeleteI really like this. Nice writing. :-)
ReplyDeleteI too liked the repeated phrase 'like a child, like a child'
ReplyDeleteThat was the moment for a brief 'thinking pause' before carrying on. As usual, your poetry is beautiful.
'like a child..like a child'..perfect..children truly are awake..it probably does require some effort to re-kindle that..beautiful words..Jae
ReplyDeleteI love the simplicity and yet it says so much.
ReplyDeleteSheilagh, thanks! Sometimes phrases turn in ways I do not intend, so I'm glad you liked this one.
ReplyDeleteoldegg, thank you. It's a pleasure to have you back. I really wrestled with the like a child line, but the repetition seemed to work.
Susannah, thanks so much.
Leigh, thanks. Last week I did some reading in Blake--maybe his Songs of Innocence had something to do with the repeated phrase.
Jae, thanks. Yes, for us adults some effort is required. But I've always been fascinated with that split second just after waking--we are aware of what's around us, but all of the day's tensions, guilts, fears etc. have yet to take hold. Would that we could live whole days in such a state!
Laurie, thanks so much for stopping by and being so kind to comment!
The words fit in perfectly here, I found the word nasty to be tricky and I agree the repetition of "like a child" was perfect. This was beautiful
ReplyDeleteI've read nearly all of this weeks prompt responses. This is one of the best. Heartfelt, concise and well-constructed. i like your style!
ReplyDeletehttp://www.kimnelsonwrites.com/2011/07/09/altered-reverie/
mindlovemisery, thanks--I also struggled with "nasty." It's such a jarring word. I'm glad you found my use of it fitting. I had (have) my doubts!
ReplyDeleteKim, your kindness means a lot, thanks! I've yet to make it through everyone's contributions--after a difficult week at work I needed a morning at the beach. I'm heading over to your blog now to see what wonders I can behold. I know I'll not be disappointed!