Parlor
The room was kept dark,
funereal silence only broken
by the hum of the fish tank filter.
A few bookshelves, lined with
Encyclopedia Britannica
and the latest children’s
books, the kind one might find
in a hospital waiting room,
all pulled invitingly close
to each shelf lip.
In one corner
a piano, never played,
now that she’s gone,
and the water in the fish tank
constantly drips
like the tears that wrinkle
the unread pages of your book.
-----------------------
Submitted to dVerse OpenLinkNight. A lot of good poetry happens over there tonight--type a few lines and send them in!
Oh nico... this is so sad.. such a room so empty I could feel the disaster already in the first line. So well written
ReplyDeleteThanks Bjorn--empty, lonely rooms always have a story to tell.
DeleteOh, Nico, this is so sad and felt... great images... love the ending.
ReplyDeleteNico, so many strong images in this poem. I wonder just who the person was who died. Why there was a piano that was never played. Why the latest children's books. So many unanswered questions......but then again, that's life.
ReplyDeleteThanks Mary--yeah, I left a lot for the reader to puzzle out.
Deletedef felt the sadness man...the aloneness even amidst all the stuff...but each is like a constant reminder as well of what once was....
ReplyDeleteThanks Brian--what once was.
Deletethis really tugs at the heart strings. so sad and beautiful. the end, oh so perfect, stole me away.
ReplyDeleteThanks RMP!
DeleteDoesn't say when, or who, or how..
ReplyDeletebut it doesn't need to in order to get to the kernel of grief.
Thanks Aprille, that hard kernel of grief eliminates some details while highlighting others.
DeleteThe last two lines were unexpected, and brought the poignancy and sadness stronger ~ Very skillful narration, Nico ~
ReplyDeleteThanks Grace!
DeleteGripped me deep. Very expressive and honest capture of the moment. I like very much. Expecially because in that silence, you are forced to look around and notice such things.
ReplyDeleteThanks Henry--strange how some details stand out.
Deletewonderful narration!
ReplyDeleteThank you Kamana!
DeleteNico, such good sensory observation lends a lot of emotion to this. It made me want to know the back-story.
ReplyDeleteThanks Victoria, maybe the back-story will come out in another poem some day.
Deleteas ever nico I am calmed and inspired by your stripped back approach. I always intend to write this way but to my detriment I get carried away with the bug or w/e it is that makes a 'style' do what it does when we step up and type. at least the difference is stunning as I read due to my complication which somehow makes it worth it.
ReplyDeleteI watched the movie 'Amor' a couple of nights back and this holds the hand of what remains of the movie in my head as I process the heavy feelings of absence.
thanks nico.
Thanks Arron--just goes to show there is more than one way to do poetry. May you always get carried away when you write!
DeleteAbsence is so present. I feel remembered grief. Well written.
ReplyDeleteThanks Beth, you said it well.
DeleteYour spare and unadorned style is perfectly suited to this poem, with its imagist overtones, the subtle clues - "funereal" "hospital waiting room" - clinging to the objects like wary adjectives... until that final verse, where finally the emotions seep unashamedly through.
ReplyDeleteThanks Sam--yes, this was something of an imagist experiment.
DeleteThe hardest thing, after someone passes, is dealing with the places they once joyfully inhabited. This tugged at my heartstrings and made me sad.
ReplyDeleteThanks Talon--sadness permeates some places, maybe forever, or at least as long as memory.
DeleteA poignant poem...I felt the sadness at the end there...very well written. It's a pleasure to meet a new poet :)
ReplyDeleteThanks Louise, the pleasure is all mine.
DeleteThe presence of absence is a hard thing to describe - but you've done it really well here. The sparse style is especially appropriate.
ReplyDeleteThanks Tony--absence does make its presence felt.
DeleteNico, this is a beautifully written poem on loss.
ReplyDeletePamela
Thanks Pamelita, I'm so happy you liked it!
DeleteGrief, palatable, poignantly transmitted in your piece. It is its simplicity deepens the tone.
ReplyDeleteSomething so well-written must be heartfelt. I'm sorry if it is so.
Thank you Jeff--heartfelt, yes, but at the moment it was only a vicarious grief. For such a short and quickly penned poem, a lot of different influences went into the making of this. Rooms I remember, details from different places, and the feelings I've shared with many people. That being said, my own tears have indeed wrinkled pages from time to time.
DeleteDrifting in the melancholy feel of the words, I can sense the silence..the ending was perfection.
ReplyDeleteThanks Truedessa--I'm happy you enjoyed it.
DeleteLoss is so hard. This is sad.
ReplyDeleteSad and lovely capture.
ReplyDelete